Recently, I was reading a recent edition of Awake! by the Jehovah’s Witnesses. It’s the one about moral decadence and stuff. It brought something to my mind; what had been bugging me for a while now. It was actually the topic of discussion among my friends and I some weeks ago. I remember once on a local TV, Inside Out with Agatha Amata, it was discussed openly with guests. I don’t remember exactly who said what but there were arguments in support of the action, but in the favour of men. It’s extra-marital affairs. I can’t say if this occurs where you are but there are reports that these are on the steady rise around the world.
I understand when people say marriage requires maturity. I completely agree. I only have an issue with maturity itself. What does it mean to be mature? I would easily agree if it’s said to be a process given the changes in human life. But does the maturity for marriage entail the shameless betrayal of vows and the uncanny demand for allegiance and faithfulness of spouses. I believe what is good for the goose is good for the gander, and most would agree too. So, I ask myself why this is so bloody rampant these days.
I must admit here that I have played my dirty part in this shame. I can’t exonerate myself from it; I’d be telling a big lie. In any case, I didn’t originate any of my involvements. It only happened that there were needs that I helped fulfill, of which I still feel guilty by association and I am sorry. To me, the real issue is, why start something you can’t keep with? Why get married if one can’t stay in it. It’s so stale to find married men with single women in sexual compromise. Since there’s no crime in being single, or having children outside marriage why then get married and ’sleep out’? Some men even abandon their families for their ‘girlfriends’. I don’t how good that feels when compared to the woman leaving for a much younger man: may be her own son’s age. Some other men believe that once they provide for the home and service their wives, then there’s no need to complain. Can the woman trade places with the man, or service her husband and carry on to other men since she has performed her duty as a wife? Ask any man this.
I believe that marriage has become a societal obligation because it’s the society that really bothers younger ones to get married. Yet, the same society openly condones the moral decadence within it. Don’t get me wrong, I am not calling for a perfect society but what is the point in pressuring people to get married if there’s no encouragement to uphold it. Parents advise their children to get married without having left (m)any good reasons and examples to foster a good union. The funniest part of this is that the men who cheat on their wives, especially with far younger women, insist on the fidelity of wives to them and can readily shoot any man who goes near their daughters. I have this friend who ‘celebrated’ his last day as a bachelor with a woman other than his proposed wife and started sleeping out the same week of his wedding!
To most women, “men are dogs” and men just simply agree in character. But then, these “dogs” are not homosexuals. Women help make them what they are so, who’s fooling who? Worse off, this has fed the mentality of most women I know. To them, a faithful man is a perfect pretender. Do men also look out for a homely “bitch” to take care of the home and kids? I wonder.
